In response to the Boston bombing: What am I called to do?

There are two things I know God has not given me a mind for: money and politics.

It truly is embarrassing how little I know about politics, especially coming from a military family. Terrorism and war have always been close to home, literally. We were stationed in D.C. when September 11th happened. We had friends die at the Pentagon. My dad has been deployed a couple of times. I can remember being curled up in a warm blanket in the back of one of my parent's friend's trucks on the flight line in New Mexico as we watched the stealths take off for the mission that would result in the first bomb being dropped on Saddam Hussein's palace. My friend's dad was the pilot who dropped the bomb. At one point, the flag that flew on that mission with the pilots was actually in my dad's possession.

I say that so you know I'm not disconnecting myself from everything that happened today. As I write this and process what I feel called to do in this time I feel I need to inform myself with God's word in light of the perspectives I grew up with. Since I really don't grasp politics like many around me do, I fall back on the one truth I can stand on.

First off, we've all seen the many comments about today. They're the same things people say when any tragedy happens. "The world is so screwed up." "People are evil." "Why are people so broken?" "Where is God? And why does He let this stuff happen?"

I am in no way about to tackle that huge topic of God being in control over all things and why the problem of evil exists (because that's another thing God hasn't really given me a mind for...philosophy. If you want details on that stuff, you should have coffee with my hubby. He gets it much better than I do.) I do want to share the verse God put on my heart as soon as I logged on to Facebook this afternoon and saw all the comments.

"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalms 34:18

The Lord is close...He is near. He saves the crushed.

These are two things everyone needs to remember today. I sometimes wonder if days like today are when we allow God nearest to us as a country.

It was a very unusual train of thought for me to have, but after posting that verse my thoughts immediately turned towards the President and all the stress he's probably under today. I felt a heavy burden for him and prayed for him.

And here's where I may get a little controversial.

I took this note down in my commonplace this year on the 21st of January, the day of the inauguration.

"Thinking of King Darius and Artaxerxes in Ezra and today's inauguration makes me wonder what would happen if we really prayed for our President and government leaders like we're called to. Would they want and support, even provide for our religious freedoms and practices like they did in the book of Ezra? True, I have no faith in the President apart from God, who turns the hearts of kings..."

These thoughts quickly returned to me again today as I realized the President will probably get tons of flack over the next few weeks and months about any decisions made regarding today. Any President is in the spotlight for these sort of critiques, not just the current one. I can't even begin to imagine being in the place where I have an entire country to steward. So, what am I called to do in light of today's events, evil in this country and world, and a President and government leadership that I may or may not agree with?

"First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, for kings (presidents) and all who are in high positions..." 1 Timothy 2:1&2

Maybe I'm dumb, but it's that simple for me. I don't have to pick a political side to support to do this. I'm just called to pray and be thankful for the leadership God has placed over me in this country. Is that a challenge for you? It is for me. Be thankful? What does that even look like? I have no clue, but God calls me to it, so I believe He will show me what that looks like. The first thing I want to do is cast judgment, which is the exact opposite of what God calls us to do (Matthew 7:1). Vengeance and judgment belong to the Lord alone (Romans 12:19). But do I believe this enough to humbly lay down my political beliefs and trade them in for the belief that God has called me to pray for my leaders?

If you're feeling like that is sooooo not going to happen, ask God for help. He's calling you to it. He can provide for you to do it. Pray for the President and all his decision making teams as well as the government in Boston and Massachusetts and all the other government leaders who will be involved in this aftermath.

Again, my prayers are with those involved in today's tragic events and the leaders who are making decisions on how to deal with them. God is most near to them now.

xoxo

P.S. Please note that I am in no way claiming to be a theologian or a political genius. I just wanted to share some of God's truth that was laid on my heart. You can take God's Word to the bank, even if you forget every single one of my opinions or comments, and please do. haha

What more could this girl want in a blog?

I recently found a blog about two of my favorite things, in one place!! It's called: Eat This Poem. Food and poetry equals love in my book. I love, love, love writing poems about food, breakfast dates, traveling and finding fun cuisines, as well as reading poetry about food. So, so fun! You totally have to check it out.

A poem about radishes. Now who would think to write about that!? Check out this post for the poem I loved. :)

While prepping for workshop tonight, I ran across this quote from one of my favorites, G.K. Chesterton:

Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.

Now, anyone who knows me knows I. love. cheese. Up until my doctor asked me to cut it out of my diet for part of this pregnancy, I would buy (I'm not even lying) AT LEAST six different types of cheese each week on my grocery trips. B and I loooove trying new cheeses. I feel like a high class snob at times because a lot of our late night snacking in bed includes fruit, cheese, and crackers. haha Anyways, Chesterton's quote was kind of a challenge for me. Maybe I'll be attempting a poem about cheese at workshop tonight. ;)

Happy poetry reading!

xoxo

Photo credit from Eat This Poem.

A breakfast I think Edith Schaeffer would appreciate.

B got to stay home with me again this morning for breakfast. Since I'm on Spring Break and have nothing other than tons of cleaning and organizing to get done this week, you better believe I took the opportunity to make this super easy Dutch Baby Pancake. I love this recipe because it truly was so easy, and you could add any fruit or topping you have. I also used half whole wheat to boost the protein. I was so happy when I opened the oven to see the tall wall of Dutch pancake that I unknowingly created. I forgot how beautiful it would look once cooked!

While cooking it I was thinking about Edith Schaeffer. Specifically, I was thinking about the few recipes she shared in one of her books that were just as easy as this one.

I've talked about Mrs. Schaeffer and all her wonderfully creative books before. She truly is one of those Proverbs 31 women I look up to as a young wife and soon to be mom. It's amazing to me how many times I've actually been made fun of by brothers and sisters in Christ for absolutely loving being so homeward focused (while still working part time) and serving my husband. Yes, I do iron his clothes for him every Sunday night, even if it doesn't look like it by the time he gets to worship practice in the morning, and I do because God has given me a heart that finds joy in serving and helping my husband. One of the best gifts my husband can ever given to me is when I hear him sigh when he comes home from work or a long day of meetings and say, "I love being home." Mrs. Schaeffer greatly encouraged me in finding my God-given role as a homemaker through her writing. One topic I could go on and on about is art and Christianity, and she writes about that often as well, as the while keeping Jesus at the center of everything. That is so, so important, and she manages to do it, and do it well. So well that the Lord gave her 98 year to serve Him and others through her giftings on this earth!! I was so happy to see that number 98 pop up on the article announcing her death. 98 full years her on this earth, and I know she's dancing right alongside her husband right now in heaven for our King Jesus.

I could go on and anaylze her books like the English major that I am, complete with quotes, citations, and lengthy footnotes, but I'll leave that for another time. (Maybe I should start reviewing books on here?) I do want to share one of the things God has impressed on my heart over the two short years of being married from reading her books.

We are a ministry family. God's called us to that. As of right now we are praying about the specific things God has called us to as a family in the realms of church planting. But being in ministry as a young wife for the last (almost) two years now, I have had a few of those experiences where some hungry and hurting friend shows up at your door and you need to cook up some lunch for them, or you have to figure out how to accomodate space for 30 or more people in your tiny dollhouse sized home, as well as dinners, and oh yeah, where will the children play? :) It's always chaotic, but these times are looked back upon as fond memories where we did watch Jesus move. I don't remember the stress of the moment, or some ingredient I may have forgotten to ruin the entire dinner.

That being said, God really impressed a specific term ( I guess you could call it that?) upon my heart through Mrs. Scheffer's writings. It's not a term she ever used, it's just something God has called me to cultivate in my home, family, and in ministry. That term or calling He has been teaching me about through my journaling, reading, and many notes that I've taken over the last two years is creating a Jesus culture. I really felt God saying that's what takes places when you open your home for ministry to happen. You are welcoming a group of people from many different cultures and backgrounds to partake in a common thing, that common thing hopefully being a relationship with Jesus. It was my second to last semester in college when I first picked up her books and I really felt God asking me to be open and okay with many different cultures and backgrounds in my life. I'm still not sure what this means today, but God has again and again asked me that. He has also shared with me that I'm not simply opening up a room made out of paint and wood, but a place that needs to be inviting and welcoming for people to want to spend time there and share their hearts. More very recently God spoke to me again about this Jesus culture He is calling me to cultivate, and I took down another note about what He was telling me in my commonplace. Here it is:

"2/15: Jesus culture: creating a culture where people are able to grow, confess sin, repent, and be broken totally without fear of fear or judgment."

Due to lessons learned in my own life, God was showing me how desperately important it is to not be judgemental of people so they feel accepted and able to confess and repent sin. Acceptance was the word God was really placing on my heart. So, today all I know is Jesus is calling me to help encourage this creative culture through art, ministry, homemaking, and openly accepting and loving others in my home. Still not sure what this means for the future, but God is slowly revealing it to me. (I hope this made sense to someone out there.)

How does this relate to Mrs. Schaeffer? Well, she was really all about that. She is all about flowers at the table, for no other show but to display thought and love you put in to the preparation and meal for the people you are breaking bread with. She is all about encouraging loud laughter from little boys as they run around the house banging on pots and pans. Who knows, maybe God blessed you with a little psalmist from your womb and this is his way of glorifying Jesus with music from a young age. Just think about that: walking in to a colorful home where music is constantly playing, goodies are hot from the oven, and you are always, always welcome to come over and share some thoughts and tea. Who wouldn't want to hang out there? :)

So ladies, I highly encourage you to pick up one of her books. :) See what gifts God has given you to cultivate in your family for His glory. For more reading about Mrs. Schaeffer, these are two articles I've loved reading this week: my favorite being I Owe My Home to Edith Schaeffer and then Challies' article.

I also wanted to share this article on being married young. I married at 19, my husband was 20, and we're about to have our first little boy at 21 and 22. I'm learning how truly crazy we are for doing this, but God is so good and He is the one that sustains any marriage, young or old. Believe me, God is asking me to trust Him over and over again each day that it truly is better for me to walk this life beside my husband, than it would be for me to walk it alone (Genesis 2:18). Happy reading, friends!

xoxo

A faithless gardener.

Look at what I found when I raked the leaves out of my garden this morning! :D They're a little mutilated from the rake because I didn't see the green beauties until I tore a few leaves apart.

I was so happy to see these little guys! I realized what little faith I had in anything coming back this year. It kind of reminded me of how God, in His good, good grace, empowers us to bear fruit in spite of ourselves. :) I transplanted an entire section of berries and herbs that I added to my garden last year, and I really feared any of it coming back. But they're doing what plants do best: growing! It looks like everything came back. I think I may have pulled up a few green onions by accident. Couldn't tell if they were weeds or not. ;)

Who would have thought these last few times I needed parsley I could have grabbed a few sprigs from my own garden? ;) I know this beautiful weather isn't going to last until the summer since Utah is so hormonal, but it was nice to see my garden getting a headstart even if I'm not.

Happy gardening, my friends! :)

xoxo

Confessions of an (almost) new mom.

Wow. I finished a role of toilet paper tonight because I've cried so much. About what? Nothing in particular, but then again, just about everything. I watched this adorable documentary about a married Down syndrome couple...aaaand it was all down hill (or up?) from there with the crying, being pregnant, missing my husband, blah, blah, blah. So, may I indulge?

I've felt so selfish lately. Probably the most selfish I've ever felt, or realized I am, in my entire life. I hate even writing this on here, but so much of me has recently longed for it to just be me and B forever. And ever. And ever. And then I feel the baby kick me in the rib. "Too late, mom." I know, I know. Nervous laugh. Or at least, I'm starting to know. The bright side is that parenthood isn't an eternal identity thing, it's just a calling for a period of life. I'm going to be B's wife even after parenthood ends though. :)

Am I terrible? Is it terrible that I just wrote that? I just want to savor one last day trip alone with my husband without thinking about carseats and meal plans and who's watching my kid. I think yesterday morning could very well have been the last morning B and I got to sleep in together for who knows how long. He's been working so much, and we have opposite schedules a lot....so the next eight weeks are pretty much shot. Oh, it's coming so fast.

Well, now that I've showed you guys in words what a terrible mom I'm going to be (haha...it's ok, you can laugh with me), let me remind you that there is HOPE! Not in Lexy, no, not in me. In JESUS. And HIS grace. It's only by His presence in my life that I EVER have the ability to put these feelings aside, except for nights like tonight, nights that are luckily far and few between. Don't put your hope in me as a parent, in B as a dad, in the two of us as a married couple. No, please don't. You'll be let down all too fast. I only hope you can see little slivers of Christ through all of those different aspects of our life and rejoice in the progressive growth in Christ we get to experience.

 On a lighter note, anyone else out there think I look like my own momma in this picture? :)

I am so lame that I can't figure out how to turn this picture to the side. hahahaha I was made for the typewriter, not the computer. It's up and down in my file, but won't upload that way. I was trying to upload it to Facebook all night last night and today, but it just wouldn't for some reason. Oh well. :)

xoxo

32 weeks and counting.

 

Credit goes to my hubby for walking going on a little barefoot hike with me today. :) He's more artsy than I give him credit for. Although, you can tell he's a musician...because he likes to make most things look like album covers. haha

 

Here we go! Another pregnancy survey. 32 weeks, folks! 32 weeks!!

 

1. What name did you and your spouse call your baby before you knew the gender?

 

Hmmm...good question. I don't really remember ever calling him anything except for baby or kid.

2. When did "Oh-my-gosh-we're-having-a-baby" really sink it?

 

Still hasn't I guess. Some moments are like that...but for the most part I don't know if it ever fully sinks in.

3. When you think of yourself as a mom, what's the first thing to come to mind?

 

Ponytails. haha Maybe that's because most moms always have their hair up while running around chasing toddlers and throwing another load of laundry in. :)

4. Is your nursery complete? What's the theme and what do you have left to complete?

Nope, and as of today I decided I'm done with all my projects and craft ideas. Baby has enough. I need to get some more storage type furniture and just get everything put together, but I'm done with my little projects. I really need to get everything up on the wall...this took months and months for me to do after we got married. B has yet to convince me to hang a few drawings a friend of ours did, or my butterfly collections. I guess I'm stalling in the baby's room too. But really....I need to jump on this. Good thing next week is spring break.  

5. List 5 qualities you hope your baby will possess:

 

Jesus, love, wisdom, a genuine love for people, a love and respect for his earthly parents, aaand his daddy's eyes or curls. :) Do all those count as qualities?

6. What's your ideal labor experience?

 

Lots and lots of trusting on God for whatever He wants labor to look like for me...be it a natural birth, pain-free epidural birth, C-section with lots and lots of rest afterwards...whatever He wants for His plants and purposes in my life. I've thought about this lots and I still know that I have no clue what it will look like until I get to the hospital. So anyways, I just want the baby out at the end. ;)

7. List 5 things that have changed in your relationship with your spouse since you've been pregnant:

We sadly have what seems like a third person in our bed at all times now. My stupid Boppy pillow (I'm very thankful for whoever secretly got it for me...I do love it) gets between me and my hubby. I can't sleep right next to his back all night like I used to because there's a giant pillow between us. It does keep me from being in pain though. :) That's the only reason he puts up with it. haha

 

What hasn't changed? We think about money differently now. We think about the future differently, I think. Ya know, since we have this little bambino to think about too. I think about B differently (in a good way). I know both of our prayers have changed to include this little dude we've been called to raise. :) That's cute to hear your husband pray for your baby. :)   

8. List 5 things you think will change once your baby arrives:

Haaaa..........sleep habits, fo sho. I'm pretty sure my personal, daily schedule will change. I know I will have to plan taking care of my hubby differently too. I can't cook dinner throughout the entire day simply because I enjoy that. I will have a baby to plan around too. I think B and I will really have to be more intentional about dating each other also. I've been thinking lots about that lately. Also, spending habits will probably adjust even more.

9. Where do you think you'll be when you go into labor? Why?

I'm really hoping I'm not at school with a classroom full of 3 year olds. HA!

10. Have you been talking to your baby? Playing music?

I talk to him in my head. Does that make sense? I don't talk outloud...but I do talk to him a lot. I do play music, but not on purpose for him to listen to. Although, B was playing the guitar in the living room one night and the little bambino was FREAKING OUT when he stopped. So he started playing again and calmed right down. That was pretty awesome. :)

11. In what ways do you hope your baby is like your spouse?

Most ways because B is much more chill than I am. :) I hope he looks JUST like him, too. :)

12. In what ways do you hope your baby is like you?

Blonde hair would be really cute. :)

13. How long will you wait for the next baby, or if this is your last one, why/why not?

Oh goodness. I can't think about that right now.

14. Who will be with you during labor? Who will visit you in the hospital during your recovery?

I'm pretty sure B is the only one we're planning on having in the room with us. As for after, I honestly don't care. The whole world could come visit me. I think I'd like that. :)

15. How much will you tell your baby (child, teenager) about your past? Why/why not?

Enough that he knows I'm a sinner saved by grace. Enough to warn and teach. I guess I need to ask for wisdom on what NOT to tell him. haha

16. Do you have any hopes for your child's activities? (Sports, academics, school preference, activities, etc)

Nope. As long as he loves Jesus, that's all the man he needs to be.

17. When will you tell your baby about the birds and the bees?

hahahaha I will probably be forced too much earlier than I think I will.

18. Which childhood memory do you hope your child will have (similar to one you fondly remember)?

I really hope he gets to remember a time his mom and or dad shared Jesus with them and prayer with them like I remember my mom doing with me and my little brother.

19. And finally, Be annoying! What "advice" do you want newly pregnant women to know?

You need so much less than you think you need. Maternity clothes, books, baby items, decorations. You've got boobs? You're good. Ok, not really, but seriously...kinda really. ;) I've also been shocked that the only time I'm really in crazy pain is when I haven't had a chance to exercise that day. So exercise! I've never done this regularly before being pregnant, but I think I'm going to make it a norm now. You really do have so much more energy.

 

 

It comes and goes.

That's energy that I'm talking about. These days at least. I've got to make the most of it when I can, even if that means planning out my nesting and meals when I'm awake at 4 a.m. haha! Today I got home around 4 after a long, but good, day at work, and sat down on the couch with some water and my laptop, planning on never getting up again for the rest of the night. But alas, I talked myself into doing my workout, and I've suddenly had energy ever since. Yesterday I went crazy to town making all sorts of things for the babies room , and one cute project for myself, and I've had enough energy in the last hour to finish some of them up. :)

Please know that I am generally not this crafty, I promise. At least...I'm not as crafty as many other people I know. I did many of these projects because I was able to use things from around my house or they required basic craft supplies that I have on hand from past projects. These are also projects I've been keeping track of on my pinterest boards for months now, and have finally decided to just do them, so it's not like I find something and get it made before dinner time. ;) It's takes lots and lots of pins, time, and courage. haha

This book garland was super easy to make! I made it for the baby boy's room, but my baby shower is also book themed, so I thought it would be cute to use there as well. I just pulled the pages out of an old book I had around the house that I've used in the past for various projects. I also had the string. I did buy the mini clothes pins, but I plan on using those in lots of different ways in the baby's room, so I didn't mind spending the 1.50 or whatever they were (plus my teacher's discount at Michael's! Score!). The paper that I used for the book covers I did buy, but just because they were .59 each and I didn't have a spare cereal box on hand. I do plan on making some more where I use cereal boxes and just paint them, or the pattern of the boxes themselves may be kind of cute and add to the creative mix.

 

 

I always check the clearance for acrylic paint. I usually find some funky colors for .19. I think this was one of those colors I found, but I just so happen to be using it in the baby's room quite a bit. I bought these letters right after we were married to use this idea in our bedroom, I just never got around to finishing it. Plus, I think it looks much cuter for the little guy's room. I've got them sitting above the doorframe of his room, and I'm going to cut out a small cardboard star or two and paint them gold and stick them up there as well.

 

 

 These toilet paper roll owls are so adorable!! I'm going to make a few more and set them on different shelves in his room. I think it's so fun how you can create different personalities with each owl. This was a very, very cheap project!! I think everyone in America has spare toilet paper rolls on hand.

 

 



And last but not least, these fun flats that I repainted!! I am a sucker for any item of clothing that has a cat on it...so I had to make these when I saw the how-to. The paint was a little old, so who knows how long they'll last, but I think I originally purchased the shoes for just a couple of bucks anyways. And they aren't the most comfortable, so I've only worn them one or two times, but now I have a cute reason to push through the pain! ;)

I hope you guys enjoyed checking up on my nesting projects. :) Do you see a theme of some sort coming together? haha

xoxo